Sick of sick

Little m home from school today.  Threw up in the kitchen sink.  Maybe bug that little d had.  Maybe drainage.  Three more times since then.  Maybe I don't give a f(lip) anymore.

Told my mom that I'm tired of praying.  I pray everyday for my kids to stay well.  Seems the more I pray the sicker they get.

I probably don't really believe that.  I also probably don't. give. a. f(lip).

I probably shouldn't use that language.  Guess I'll edit out.  Felt better to type the other word.

D took little d to school and little md to speech.  While at speech D texted to say little md not wanting to say his words.  Sigh.  Not even sure how he is going to handle school next year.

Still waiting on peds office to call back.  1, need refill script for zofran.  2, need shot record for little md.  3, little d hasn't pooped since last wednesday and she's had mirilax for three days.

See?  I give the f(lip) up.

Minecraft and other such games

My kids are WAY into video games.  Minecraft, Skylanders, Plants vs. Zombies and some Wii games.  I guess we indulge them, but they are really good kids.  Both girls are straight "A" G/T students reading way about their grade level.  So I'm ok with the video games.  ;)

{I can see that my writing skills are lacking.  I used to whip out a post in no time.  Now I can't seem to finish a complete thought.  It's not that I don't have any down time.  It's that my down time is not uninterrupted.  Or that my thought process aren't.}

I really really am not into video games myself.  The occasional Wii dance jam notwithstanding.  But I love that it is a bond between them and D.  And I love that I can say "I have not idea, ask dad".  I don't get to delegate that often, so when I do I love it.

I also enjoy hearing them playing with each other nicely.  Doesn't always happen with the video games, but when it does I sigh and smile.

Little md will be yelling "dig that hole!" to little m.  "You're a beast!"  "Boom shaka laka!"

Crazy funny coming out of a four year old's mouth.  ;)

41 days until the last day of school!

Kid Questionnaire Part Two and Three

I've been reading through my blog again start to finish.  I wish I had kept up with it.  SO many little stories about kiddos that have gone unrecorded.  Seems like I went from thinking "this will make a great blog post" to "how can I word this for FB".  :(  I want to get back to blogging tho.

I had THIS post.  I asked the same questions to Little m and Little md.

Here's little md's answers: age 4 (almost 5)

1. What is something mom always says to you?  go pee
2. What makes mom happy? to go pee
3. What makes mom sad? not going pee
4. How does your mom make you laugh? you can't (while laughing)
5. What was your mom like as a child? like me
6. How old is your mom? i can't remember
7. How tall is your mom? big
8. What is her favorite thing to watch on TV? dance moms
9. What does your mom do when you're not around? we don't know yet, i guess make things without me
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for? *shrugs*
11. What is your mom really good at? taking showers...i mean giving showers
12. What is your mom not very good at? going swinging-you will break the swing
13. What does your mom do for her job? paint nails
14. What is your mom's favorite food? beans?
15. What makes you proud of your mom? letting me eat hamburgers
16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? sky on paw patrol
17. What do you and your mom do together? bake cookies when the girls are gone
18. How are you and your mom the same? because we love to do things together
19. How are you and your mom different? sometimes we don't love to do things together
20. How do you know your mom loves you? because you love me
21. What does your mom like most about your dad? because he hugs you and kisses you
22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go? to a restaurant

And Little m's answers: age 7 (and a half)

1. What is something mom always says to you? i love you
2. What makes mom happy? hugs and kisses
3. What makes mom sad? when we're sick
4. How does your mom make you laugh? her dances
5. What was your mom like as a child? i guess me, you looked like me
6. How old is your mom? 40
7. How tall is your mom? pretty tall
8. What is her favorite thing to watch on TV? Top Chef
9. What does your mom do when you're not around? paint her nails probably
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for? her kids
11. What is your mom really good at? cooking
12. What is your mom not very good at? nothing really
13. What does your mom do for her job? be a mom
14. What is your mom's favorite food? she has A LOT!
15. What makes you proud of your mom? cause you love me
16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? Elsa!
17. What do you and your mom do together? paint our nails
18. How are you and your mom the same? our eyes, color
19. How are you and your mom different? she's older than me
20. How do you know your mom loves you? cause she tells me that A LOT
21. What does your mom like most about your dad? that he's funny
22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go? Port O'Connor

I have to say some of these are spot on.  But I don't  paint my nails all day.  There happens to be a practical nail salon set up on my kitchen table where I was asking the questions.  lol

I can't believe we are in April.  I mean this school year seems to drag but then I realize we are only months away from my baby!! starting Kindergarten.  It shocks me really.  

Whole other posts can be devoted to THAT topic.  And shall.  

A new Easter curse?

I can't even believe how many times my kids come down with illnesses.  Since Little d started school it seems like every other week.  And when you have three kiddos the illnesses last in your house a while.  And it feels like we get one week reprieve and then the next round will start.  And since when do stomach bugs go around ALL YEAR LONG??

I remember in school that stomach viruses came around once a year (I distinctly remember this because I was terrified of throwing up!)  And if you happened to catch it, well it lasted about a day.  At the most.  I usually woke up feeling bad and by evening I was nibbling on mashed potatoes and by the next day--back to normal.

But now.  Kids end up in the ER dehydrated all the time!  My kids have been in the hospital several times because of it.  Sometimes not from an actual stomach bug, but from another illness that upsets their stomach to the point of dehydration.

And every month you hear of some stomach virus going around.  In October we dealt with it here. First Little d had a short bout and the Little m a horrible bout.  But every month we would hear of others having it.  Around every holiday.  And on Valentine's Day Little md came down with one.  Last night Little d started with one.  WTF?  Seriously.

I used to dread February as a kid.  It seemed like that was the month it came to our house.  But now I dread September (when Little m was in kinder and nearly the whole house had it--took two weeks to run through).  October (always seems like there is something going on to coincide with trick or treat.  Thanksgiving (my bro's family has had it for the past two years at that time).  December (usually right before break you hear about it at school.  January is sometimes quiet.  February (well again this year.) March--last spring break I took the girls to the doc for sore throats and he informed me they were seeing 50 cases a day of stomach virus.  And my brother's family all had it this March.  So now we have Easter in April. And when we used to go to the egg hunt at my grandma's house you always had someone there with it.

I even hear about it sometimes in the summer.  Why has it gotten so bad?  And why does it strike so hard.  There have been times where my kids have thrown up more than ten times.  And had diarrhea for a week.

What a way to start back to the blogging.  I am just having a moment.  I am tired of watching my kids suffer.

I was reading through my blog yesterday and realized how important it was to me.  And what a great documentation it was.  I really have to do this more often.  So today I type what is bothering me.  Hoping for stress relief.  And hoping to get back into the practice.

Parakeet Eggs

So those parakeets I mentioned in the last post....last year.  They have this weed laid 3 eggs.  Pretty sure they aren't done either.

Thinking about getting into writing again.  Again will prob last all of two minutes.  ;)

Is it summer yet?

I feel like I can almost smell the salt air of POC.  Well not quite.

Little md ended up testing positive for flu and he had an ear infection.  But all are now done with meds and on the mend.  This week is a three day week.

And I am ever so thankful.

D is having to work lots of overtime.  I am doing me bestest to maintain a semi clean house.  Parts of it are. haha

Did I mention we got parakeets?  No, must have just been on FB.  Speaking of FB.  I just found a website that will print out your FB.  I did it in two hardback books.  One is three years and the other is two.  I am SO very excited to get it.  I also had all of my photo albums added to it.  Hope it comes in soon.

Back to the birds.  After Poppy died a white parakeet landed in our yard.  Unfortunately it only lived a day.  But it was enough time for us to buy a cage and set up AND for the kids to get attached to the idea of a bird.  So what did I suggest?  Hey, let's all go to Petsmart and let each kiddo pick out a bird.

They are pretty.  But loud.  So loud.  All the time.  Unendingly.  Without ceasing.  Gah.  And the feathers.  And birdseeds.  AND poop!

Currently in the market for a little more upscale cage.  One with glass.  Maybe just maybe it will hold in some of the noise.  And feathers.  And birdseed.  AND poop.  haha

****

I need to get in shape.  And lose about 20 pounds.  But it's really hard to get motivated when I'm so darn tired all the stinking time.  I just thought I was tired until my first child went to school.  Ha.  I had no idea.  And now with two in school.  sigh.  I'm never going to be well rested again.  Just like my life with never be stress free.  What was I talking about again?  Oh yeah.  Need to start working out.  I'm gonna get right on that....

More of the same

Saturday little m came down with a cold.  Thought she was doing better, but today she her fever is up again to 100.7.  I'm taking her in this afternoon.

Little md has the sniffles too but doesn't seem to have any fever.  So that's good.

Little d still trucking away at school.

Friday I said out loud that the kids were doing so well on their probiotics.  It's like I wanted something to happen.

Counting down the days until summer.  Thankful for a four day weekend coming up.  :)

Everyday

Every single day I feel inadequate.  But this week I've been giving myself high fives.

We started back to school after the break and Little m had a time.  For the first time in my motherhood I had a sobbing begging child pulled from my leg by a teacher (and her aide).  Sigh.  I was sobbing as soon as I left the room as well.  I know it was the right decision of course.  But I wanted to pack her up and take her right back home.  No school?   I am o. k. with that.  No, okay.  I know that's not the smart responsible thing to do, but honestly how do you allow your child to be ripped from you?

Well for starters, the same thing happened to my brother when I was in second grade and he was in kinder.  Judging by how he turned out it did not scar him for life.  I mean he's able to live in his own house with his lovely wife and kids and not once do I see him hanging onto Mom and Dad's legs when they leave. ;)

Second.  I tell myself over and over that I cannot (unless the circumstances are dire) home school the kids.  I am so on the verge of never letting them out of the bubble, that if I did that, they would grow up to be weirdo recluses.  Seriously.  If I let myself keep them home all day with me for the rest of my life I would be perfectly fine, but they would grow up socially malnourished to say the least.  And you know....there will come a time when I want grandkids, right?  So--no home school.

I came home and paced and cried and then the aide called (as she said she would) by 8:30 and let me know that she was fine.

But I knew that the next day would be a repeat.  And it was.  But this time I didn't cry until I got home.  And then I sent an email to the teacher apologizing for the drama and telling her I was open to suggestions.  She very sweetly replied back that Little m was doing fine--it was no problem at all--and that she just loved her momma very much.

So momma put on her thinking cap.  Something for her to think about at school and distract her and surprise her when she got home....

Before Christmas we got this cow elf (as in elf on the shelf).  I won't go into the story here of it's origin, but the kids loved it even tho we did 'fake' scenes and took pictures of the elf for a business facebook page.  As I was packing up the tree and decorations I put the cow elf in the box of ornaments.  Little m was upset.  She wanted to continue to play with it.

What if the cow elf got back out of the box of ornaments (which was OF COURSE still sitting in the living room) and wrote a letter to Little m about how she overheard her distress and wanted to cheer her up and would surprise her on the days she went to school?

Brilliant right?  High five.  And it was pretty successful.

This morning we walked to the classroom.  Ms. G was standing at the open door to greet us.  "Well you're looking better this morning!"  Little m had a death grip on my hand--not leg.  I leaned over.  "Remember what you get to think about today?"  She whimpered a bit and there were tears in her eyes.  The death grip still on my hand.

And then she took a very deep breath, let go of my hand, and walked in the door.  I exchanged a thumbs up with Ms. G.

I was so incredibly proud of her.  I know how very hard that was.  How very brave she was.  And today I could not wipe the grin off of my face on the way back to the car.

Incidentally the cow elf has been named Lela.  And her treasure hunt through the house this afternoon was a smashing success.

High five.

Summer of '13

So many changes since the last post.  Little d went through a terrible month of illness.  As her pediatrician says "she's had enough vomiting for TWO lifetimes!"  But we took her to a specialist in Houston and she finally got some meds that helped.  She spent May in and out of the hospital.  GI tests and scans.  May is fast becoming my least favorite month of the year.

But once she was on the mend we decided to take a few steps.  There was some mold growing on the AC unit in the attic so we bought a mobile home, set it up on my parents' property in POC and moved in.  Meanwhile we got the AC problem taken care of here.  Now we have a beach hut!

We came back home this week for appointments.  Me to the ENT for an ear problem that will hopefully resolve.  Me with allergy testing: I'm allergic to moldx4, black walnut tree pollen and still CATS.  Will be starting shots in two weeks.  :)  Also we have hair cuts on Friday!

And I've started a new project....I'm taking a photography class.  It is SO interesting.  I am learning about how to do the settings on my camera and what they mean!!  Loving it.

Next week we have Little d's follow up in Houston and also an appt with an ENT for her.  I feel like they are going to suggest allergy testing and we are already on board with that.

I REALLY need to force myself to write every day.  Maybe I should challenge myself to do it.  Yeah that oughta work about as well as me not eating junk food all day long.  ha

Need to do a whole post on POC.  Or how Little md is no longer using his "bah" AKA pacifier.

It's been ages....

Life just goes on and on.  And somehow Facebook replaced posting here.  And that other little blog I run just for Close to My Heart stuff.

But recently I've been itching to tell more detailed stuff (that no one ever reads ha ha)--to keep a better record of what's going on.  I don't know how much picture stuff I'll post here.  Now that it requires uploading to photobucket because my blogger space is full.

My reasons are pretty simple.  I don't keep a journal in real life, and eventually, I will love for the kiddos to see all the daily little things that went on in our life.

So I've decided to start writing again.  Life has calmed down since we built a house/moved/started a kid in school/had number three all in one year.  Here's a few updates.

Little d is weeks away from graduating second grade.  She is simply brilliant.  She's reading at a fifth grade level.  Her teacher asked us at the beginning of the year if we wanted her tested for G/T because she thought Little d would enjoy it.  And we agreed.  She tested a bit ago and we just received the letter that she's been accepted to the program.  I am so proud of her.

PS I would rather be sleeping right now...I am so effing tired ALL THE TIME.

Where was I?  Oh yes sleep.  Haha,  no.  Little d.  She is also beautiful.  And absolutely adorable with her cute little reading glasses.  She is going through this phase.  Well I certainly hope it's a phase.  Of treating Little m like crap.  Little m wants nothing more than to follow Little d around as soon as she gets home from school and play/talk/just hang out with her.  Little d wants nothing to do with her.  BUT the kicker is she will fawn all over Little md.  And that's the part that frustrates me. I get if she needs space, but the way she favors one and is completely nice to him and then tells Little m 'no I don't want to play with you just Little md.' is killer.  I am working on correcting the problem.

She is also so tall.  I think she'll be passing me by next year HA.  She loves fashion and art.  Or what she perceives to be fashion and art.  Her favorite color is blue.  AND she still requires someone to sit with her while she goes to sleep.  At eight years old.  Clearly I am a failure at parenting.  ;)

There's so much more to describe her but let's move on to the next little.

Little m is a very energetic 5 year old.  She is beyond ready to be going to school like her big sister.  I hope she still feels that way a week into Kindergarten.  After the health scares of last year and the trip to the immunologist and the new pneumonia vaccine, we finally got the all clear.  Her immune system is perfectly fine.  And this year has been better.  I pray every single day.  In fact usually several times a day for their health and well being.

She is a fireball.  Always hugging and loving.  I know that sounds like two contradictory things, but she manages to fit them both into her tiny fairy body.  She is always dancing or singing or wanting to play doctor or restaurant or with Little md and his toys.  And he's usually more than happy to play with her too.

She is still changing clothes several times a day.  Adding to my ten loads of laundry per week quota.  But it's okay.  The food thing though.  Gosh she survives on the worst diet.  I don't even begin to know how to fix it.  She has a very short list of foods she will eat.  And there are a few others she will eat if the mood hits her, but other than that it's the same thing over and over.  It is one of the things that stresses me most in life.  And that is not an exaggeration.

Little md is my boy.  My little man.  And also proof that every single child is already born with their own personality.  He definitely has moments of terrible two-edness.  But then he is just as sweet as can be on the flip side.  A solid little golden haired boy in desperate need of his first haircut.  He loves all things manly.  Monster trucks. Tractors.  Dinosaurs.  Airplanes.  Tools.  The color blue.  Eating meals.  Sweating.  Being dirty.  And (I recently discovered) pictures of chicks in bikinis on motorcycles.  lol with that one.

And just last week my little baby boy grew up a little more.  He is sleeping in his room on his bed with his Spiderman sheets.  And loves it.

And can I tell you?  That first night?  It really hit me hard that my baby is slowing turning into a kid.  It always does hit me hard the first night they are sleeping on their own.  But this time because he is the last...well I guess I shed a few extra tears.

Stay tuned.  I just my post again before you know it.  hahaha

This Old House

So the other day I went to our old house.  (Which is a misnomer because it is technically only 12 years old.)  Anyway.  We still own the house and my cousin and his wife are renting it from us, they might buy it in a year or so, but they are doing repair work and paint stuff, so even if they decide not to buy, but move somewhere else, we will have an improved property to sell.  Win-win.

Anyway again.  I had a Home Gathering for CTMH there and my cousin in law gave me a tour.  It is beautiful.  Her daughter asked if it was weird coming and seeing it changed and I said no because it looks so different.  It doesn't feel like our house.  I was really happy to see it.

It was also funny because when we moved into it, the first thing we did was paint the master bedroom.  I choose a medium grey to match the bedding set we had.  I know, rookie mistake.  But I did want it dark so my lovely husband could sleep in there when he worked nights.  You know, to keep the room darker during the day.  Well.  I didn't mind the darkness of it, but it never quite matched the bedding and within two years we bought a king size bed and of course no longer used the bedding.  But the new bedding I picked was brown with palm trees.  Really it's not quite as bad as it sounds.

The intent was to paint the walls chocolate brown eventually.

Did I mention in our current house we still need to paint the interior doors?  Yeah, we never got around to changing that bedroom color.

But cool thing is my cousin in law said "yeah and we loved this blue color in the bedroom so we didn't change it..."

Huh.

Blue?

Guess that's why I never liked it with the grey and tan bedding....

Politics, Shall We?

Oh my is anyone else terrified of Obama's second term??

I really think this is it.  The end of America's story.  I recently watched that film 2016.  The writer talks about how he used to read about the great empires of the past, their rise and fall.  And it was eerie because I remember reading about them as a student as well.  And thinking, how long can America last?  Well, is this the answer.  Now?

It's spooky.  I see people on FB a lot talking politics.  I see the news media.  I even have family members.  That all think that things are just peachy.  That Obama has made the world a better place.  Gas prices sky high?  Killing of embassy ambassadors?  Unrest all around the globe?  47% of Americans receiving food stamps??  This is better?

Or is this just what things looked like at the end of the 1970s?  Please God I pray that we see a turn around. I pray the media is skewing the poll numbers and that most Americans (at least the 53% that are not on food stamps) are going to vote for Romney.

Meanwhile I sit in the red state of Texas with my fingers crossed.

The mother in law post

I've had a bit of a breakthrough.  Within myself.

An epiphany.  Thank you Jesus.

My in-laws recently came into some money.  As in 'up from the ground Texas tea' or however the hillbilly song goes.  And it made her (if this was even possible) more obnoxious.  She made EVERY single conversation about money.  And how much they had and how they were going to 'take care of themselves first and then take care of the grandkids'.  That is a direct quote.  By the way...what does one say to that?  Thank you?  I understand?  No problem?  Have a nice cruise?  I nodded awkwardly.  (shrug)

Then in an amazingly awkward turn of events she gave me a check.  She actually had tears in her eyes and I can say I had no idea what to do.  It's as if she was trying to buy all the horrible things she had ever said or done out of my memory.  I tried to tell her I couldn't accept it, and then I thanked her when she insisted.  Saying it was too much.  Oh my never have I been in such a socially weird position.

So the other day my dad and I were talking about that moment and he thought that she was trying to make things right in her own way.  I thought she was still faking it.  Mostly to impress D.

That's not the epiphany.

So when I finally logged back onto facebook this weekend (head above water) I saw a prayer she re-posted.  It was called The Knots Prayer.  HERE's a link to what it looks like.  It was something she had reposted, but I read it anyway

It was the end that got me.  "especially the thought that I am not good enough"  Epiphany.

I knew that she never got along with her mother.  Never felt like her mother treated her equally--and still doesn't.  But now it just hit me that that is why she is so abrasive and controlling.  She is trying to compensate for a lifetime of not feeling good enough.   It suddenly all makes perfect sense.  I actually cried because I felt so sorry for her.  I've been so blessed to not only be treated like a perfect gift from God by my parents and grandparents, but to also have close friends and a brother I have been able to confide in my whole life.  And now I still have them rooting for me.  Plus I have a husband and three beautiful kids...I got girls and a boy.  She never had a little girl.  I don't know--maybe that has nothing to do with it, but it's like I finally see all the pieces falling into place.

And even if I didn't have those things to lean on, I have a very strong faith in prayer and God.  I don't know what she believes.  I mean I know she believes in God and prayer, but does she really know how to pray or feel God's presence in her heart??

So now that I'll be framing all her crap differently in my head lol maybe my life we'll be a little easier.  Or at least maybe I'll just start praying for her more.  Because to be perfectly honest, she was a little low on my prayer list....

Little d turned eight

and we had to cancel her party.

Sigh.  The good news is that all the kids are healthy!  I however, not so much.

Here I am again holed up in the bedroom.  This time with what I assume was a stomach virus.  I started feeling crappy Thursday evening, and ran 102.8 on Friday.  I thought it would be over quickly, but today is Monday and even though I am able to eat, I still feel yucky sometimes and run fever off and on.

Saturday was supposed to be Little d's Monster High party.  Cancelled of course.  Boo and Hiss.

Little d is just flourishing.  I can't believe that she's doing so well with the start of school.  She now gets dropped off in the drop off lane, I don't walk her to the door of her class.  She isn't sad about missing me.  She loves her teacher and she has one of her two best friends in her class.  The other second grade is right next door with a connecting room, so they interact a lot and she gets to see her other very best friend during the day.  I am just thrilled with it.  I can't believe that she's already eight.

They say time flies and before you know it they will be all grown up, but it's not something you can grasp until it happens to you.  She's just getting so big.  So tall.  Long hair.  Sweet smiles, shy looks.  I want to just stop time...for all of them.  I want to preserve her innocence.  I know that right around the corner is the part where she learns about the birds and the bees.  She'll learn about bad people on the world and corruption and all the junk that will take over her thoughts of fairies and Santa and the latest tunes on Radio Disney.  And I wish I could just stop time now so she stays right here.

Okay I do look forward to the conversations we'll have when she's an adult.  But I'd totally be okay with freezing time right now.

Uhg.  I hate being holed up in the bedroom.  At least I think I'm on the end of this thing.

On another note I think my husband paid me a compliment about how well organized I keep things.  I think.  Something about missing me and not feeling like he could do everything.  I'll pretend it was a well thought out compliment to my domestic awesomeness.

On an even other note.  My mom is the true domestic awesome.  Without her, truly this house would fall apart. And me too.

End of Summer

Gosh I hate tonight.  Tomorrow I send Little d to second grade.  Granted her teacher this year will be fabulous, and the 'co-teacher' equally awesome, I just hate her being at school.

I hate the schedule, the endless colds that I hope will abate this year.  The nervousness on both our parts.  She does better with this stuff than I do tho.

I love her so much.  I love having conversations with her.  I know things will be quiet during the school day.  Well--not that quiet.

There's this guy....

He surely keeps me on my toes.  We recently went to POC for a few days.  The only trip this summer--such a waste, but it is what it is.  They LOVED the beach.  And so did I.  This girl 'surfed' on a sandbar...

She keeps me in stitches!  She had a blast of course.  And here's my beautiful second grader...

Three precious jewels.

I can't forget my dad.  Since D was working nights while we were down there, my dad stepped up to help me out with the kiddos.  And good thing since Little md is quite literally attached to his hip...

Then the next day my dad arranged for us to go fishing.  It was so awesome!  The two littles got cranky and my mom took them home early, but dad, Little d and I stayed for a little bit longer...

Here's Little md's first fish.

Little d's first fish.

And Little m with her first catch.

He wanted to hold the fish so bad.  But they have spines on their fins.

Couldn't be happier with her skipjack.

 Braving a touch...

Just gimme the fish!

 She kept fishing and fishing

My little always posing for the camera girl....

Gosh I love getting away to POC.  I wish the mosquitoes hadn't feasted on Little m so much.  I wish summer still had a few more weeks!  I wish I wish.

In other news.  The baby calf we adopted and are bottle feeding is doing amazing!  She is such a cutie...

I really need to add some posts to this blog.  I've been so busy with cleaning and doing CTMH stuff that I don't sit down to write.

I want to post about the calf, my mother in law, politics, each child's personality, just life.  Maybe this week I'll get around to it.